Merry Christmas everybody.

I'm blatantly plagiarizing by copying the following X-mas snippet:

"Dear All

Holiday Greetings to everyone, I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my family and friends, but it is so difficult in today'sworld to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my attorney yesterday, and on his advice I wish to say the following:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress,non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the summer solsticeholiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for thereligious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling andmedically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for thecalendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to societyhave helped make our country great (not to imply that Australia isnecessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freelytransferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes forher/himself or others and is void where prohibited by law, and isrevocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warrantedto perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings fora period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

Disclaimer: No trees were harmed in the sending of this message; however, a significant number of electrons were slightly inconvenienced"